Hello and welcome to the amazing world of Chinglish; the laughably bad Chinese – English translations you find all over China. There are also many examples in neighbouring countries but generally China leads the way in its bizarre Gold medal winning interpretations.

Chinglish is more commonly found on signs, in menus and magazines. Even big companies can make critical errors having not bothered to hire a native Western speaker to do the translation for next to nothing.

When you are in China, never waste an opportunity to record Chinglish and make your friends split their sides round the table in the evening. If you are feeling down and miserable Chinglish is something that is guaranteed to put an instant smile on your face. I place a bet on that one.

Enjoy.

From the toilet of a nearby restaurant from my apartment.

Chicken yes, but where are they? Maybe chickens are terrified of lobsters?

I always thought Bill Clinton was a bit of a geezer! Know what I mean my son!

From the Taige Hotel: Dunha, Jilin

“Yirenbao treasure of the foot: Utilize the point to calm the nerves calmly. Reflection area that stimulates the sole to be corresponding. Impel the body endotoxin to discharge outwards. It is tried to dispel the voyage. Energetic job of next day input.”

“Yirenbao only for men biochemical product: The passion is lasting. This product is specifically designed for washing mans genitals. As the pure Chinese medicinal preparation, privacy protected life. Use when necessary so that the couple can live in healthier cleaner. Directions: Use this product on and around the pudenda by massaging for 2-3 minutes, then rinse with clean water and wipe with a wet towel. It can better effect to be used in bath.

Who will not feel free about something embarrassing? Yirenbao is made by high tech Azone process is the super concentrated Chinese medicinal preparation in dew form which will quickly kill the latent germ and promise you protection of your private parts.”

Hmmmm……..super concentrated huh? …….scary

Brushes the card to expend the special purpose-channel

Yike Plastic Surgery – Scary!

While not necessarily Chinglish, I just had to include this one. Use this toilet at your peril LOL

Not Chinglish as this was taken in Cambodia but I just had to add it.

‘The Original Walnut – When you try it the first, you will feel it is specious. When try it more time you will like it more and more. Then, you will find out it is really the delicious snack fit you.’

‘Good Taste – The natural fresh vogue delicacy is each, the famous master is refined, Special flavor. Extra natural taste The taste tashion.’

I thought it was a bit tough!

Menu from the Exquisite Dish Restaurant, Beijing
Warm mix sea intestine
Delicious belly tip
Pickled chicken feet
The old Soviet Union to help duck
Scallion chicken longitudinal strain
Orange sesame shrimp halogen explosion
Since the fish sauce
Brine platter
Mushy pork
Ichthyophthirius pig meat (disturbingly is a disease found in freshwater fish)
Snail foire gras popcorn
Braised lake trash
Dry shrimp steamed rice baby food
Jane bacteria over the alter incense
Impregnable millet wings
Reference braised kanto through taste
Turtle lake boy secret
Double dong donkey pot (highly suspect)
Griddle bull frog (often on the menu in Beijing)
United steamed sausages

Tong Xinghui Hunan Restaurant Wine List:

The Great Wall Chateau Sang Gan Reserve Cabernet
Cowshed Mountain (treasure special pot)
Hole in the pit for six years.
The Great Wall gifted Portuguese park small area super selected dry red
Chang Yu optimization level Cabernet dry red wine

Taken from the menu in the restaurant around the corner

I was wondering what that unusual taste was……

More worrying was this DIY kit in the chemist next door 😦

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